01-03-2005, 05:27 PM
Q What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A A good start!
Q How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A His lips are moving.
Q What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
Q Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
A Professional courtesy.
Q What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
A Not enough sand.
Q. What do you buy a friend graduating from Law School?
A. A Lobotomy.
Q. How do you save five drowning lawyers?
A. Who cares?
Q. What do you call a block of cement containing ten lawyers?
A. A waste of cement.
Q How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
A1 Shoot him before he hits the water.
A2 Take your foot off his head.
A3 Excuse me, I don´t understand the point of the question.
Q How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
A Cut the rope.
Q What do you do if you run over a Lawyer?
A1 Back over him to make sure.
A2 Make another notch on the steering wheel.
Q What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit?
A The bucket.
Q What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?
A When a bus load of lawyers goes off a cliff.
Q What is the definition of a "crying shame"?
A There was an empty seat.
Q What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?
A Stick his bill up his ass.
Q What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?
A An offer you can't understand.
Ace
A A good start!
Q How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A His lips are moving.
Q What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
Q Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
A Professional courtesy.
Q What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
A Not enough sand.
Q. What do you buy a friend graduating from Law School?
A. A Lobotomy.
Q. How do you save five drowning lawyers?
A. Who cares?
Q. What do you call a block of cement containing ten lawyers?
A. A waste of cement.
Q How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
A1 Shoot him before he hits the water.
A2 Take your foot off his head.
A3 Excuse me, I don´t understand the point of the question.
Q How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
A Cut the rope.
Q What do you do if you run over a Lawyer?
A1 Back over him to make sure.
A2 Make another notch on the steering wheel.
Q What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit?
A The bucket.
Q What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?
A When a bus load of lawyers goes off a cliff.
Q What is the definition of a "crying shame"?
A There was an empty seat.
Q What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?
A Stick his bill up his ass.
Q What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?
A An offer you can't understand.
Ace
